Are successful people happy because they’re successful? Or are they successful because they are happy.
Certainly it’s not a direct causation (one doesn’t directly cause the other) but what research shows is there is a clear correlation! And that is that successful people – they are happy….FIRST. Yup, you read that correctly! They were happy FIRST, then came success.
It’s easy to get caught up in the if this, then ____ argument in your head as you strive toward your goals. I go there too sometimes. But what I’ve noticed both personally and in my work with clients, is that when we start with happiness (peacefulness, contentment, appreciation & love) – that is when we see long lasting results!
If you’re embarking on a lifestyle change, please remember this:
Having the desire to make changes to improve the quality & quantity of your life is awesome (it’s what I’m all about!), but make sure that desire isn’t being driven from a place of discontent, guilt, shame or worse…hatred. Because if you lead with those emotions, in my experience the results are fleeting And the research backs this. Changes driven from shame & guilt don’t result in lasting outcomes (for more on this check out Kristen Neff & her incredible work on Self-Compassion).
How do you lead with happiness? Here are the 5 things that have helped me the most:
- Develop a body gratitude practice. Every day thank your body for the amazing things it has and is doing for you. For carrying you through the day. For creating life (hello momma’s – your body is a MIRACLE!). For it’s ability to comfort & care for others. For it’s ability to move and do the activities you love. There are so many things to be grateful for once you start looking. This may be hard at first (it was for me), but once I started it was like a snowball!
- Tame the inner critic. Yeah, that voice inside that is being a bully? Tell her to pipe down (with kindness). Speak to yourself as you would your best friend or a dear loved one. Practice compassion & kindness. Be patient with yourself on this one. For some of us that inner critic ran the show for a long time. Ousting her takes time.
- Surround yourself with people who lift you up. And be that person for others. That second part is huge. You know, “find your tribe & love them hard?” Do that. It takes a village to raise a family and a tribe to lead a healthy lifestyle. I love my SuperCrew Tribe!
- Be vulnerable. You’re not alone. But you feel like you’re alone because no one is talking about this. Until they are. And then you see it everywhere. I’m not saying start airing your dirty laundry…just start having honest & real conversations with people you love & love you. I’ve found this to be truly transformative.
- Own it. Your body. Your health. YOUR way. There is no one right way. Just the one that works for you. And don’t let anyone tell you what to do. If it feels good & right to you, just own it! #besuperyou